I Had a Dream…….an MS Dream

Good morning to you all. I am writing this while it is fresh on my mind. I was deep inside a dream when Jiggy woke me this morning. The dream was both frightening to me and rewarding as well. No, I didn’t dream that Jason and Freddie were chasing me. It wasn’t that type of frightening. I’ll explain.

In my dream I was feeling pretty good physically and mentally. I began dealing with the problems of money. So, in my dream, I went out and found a job. Again, I was having one of my good days and I didn’t tell the boss about my condition. I was convinced that I could hide it. I was hired to be the assistant manager at some fast food restaurant that had way to many offerings on it’s menu. I couldn’t understand most of the items that were on the menu but I figured that by watching and observing over time that I could get it and no one would be the wiser.

Well, my first day at work turned out to be not so good. When I got there the manager opened the back door to let me in and said how glad he was that I was there. Seems he had some important errands to run and needed to go but promised to show me the ropes later when he returned. So, that was cool. I just made myself at home and checked out the back room, kitchen, etc.

The first thing that got my attention was a break room with a TV in it. Also in it were 5 or 6 guys watching a football game. I decided to let that slide because obviously this had been going on while the manager was still here and he must have known about it and been OK with it. That was all that was happening in the back of the store so I went thru the door that separates the the food prep area from the back room. There I saw a young man working to not only take food orders but to also cook, prepare and package the food orders. So, I jumped in to help. Very quickly I noticed that this young man was fastly falling behind and that there were several families waiting on their food. More hungry people were coming into the restaurant because it was the lunch hour. I popped my head into the backroom and yelled for help but nobody responded. I continued to help, not knowing what the items were on the menu or how to prepare them. I was getting flustered and confused. Then the young man decided that he had had enough and left. I was alone in all this confusion. My vision was becoming blurred and I was getting dizzy. More and more people were seemingly flooding into the restaurant in search for food to eat.

Suddenly a few young ladies came in from the back room and began helping. But by now the prep area was a total disaster. While taking an order from a customer, I began to stutter and my speech was slurring. The customer thought I was being rude to her and demanded to see the manager. I was trying to apologize and explain my condition to her but she didn’t believe me because when we started I was communicating normally. One of the girls felt I was being rude as well and stepped in to finish taking the order. I was so flustered now that I went back to the break room and told the boys that were watching TV that if they don’t come up and help out they could all go home and not come back. Of course, no one knew who I was at this point nor could they understand what I was trying so hard to say. They laughed and mocked me.

Some more people came into the restaurant and saw me struggling to be normal. These were people that knew me and they quickly came back to try to help me out. I was very dizzy and my eyes welled up with tears. With their help, we finally got things caught up, much to the displeasure of many unhappy customers.

After all was said and done, I tried to have a quick meeting to introduce myself to the workers but by then I was in full MS mode and nobody could understand me and thusly ignored me. Though I was trying with all my might I could not communicate with anyone and nobody cared. It was then that Jiggy woke me up.

It was an unsettling way to wake up. I checked myself to be sure that it was just a dream and it was. I feel fine this morning. The dream was just a reminder that I do have this problem and that it can raise its ugly head at any time. Unlike in my dream, I try to avoid having to concentrate on more than one thing at a time and I stay away from multitasking. I also try to avoid situations where I may have to speak much or make a decision. This is my life now.


One comment

  1. Joe you write so eloquently about what it is like to have MS. I am so deeply sorry that you have this burden. But you handle it so well and with such faith that I must say you are an inspiration to me.

    Thank you for sharng. I love reading what you have to say.


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